* Long live the struggle for solidarity and world peace, and against the bourgeois imperialist  posturing of the people's enemy, Susan MacDonald!

* Death to the counter-revolutionary capitalists and plotters of the Socialist Workers' Commitee of Louth!

* Death to the boot-licking class traitors and toadying quislings of the People's Popular Front of Hull!

In line with the thinking of the new revolutionary government of Grimsby, the decadent, petit-bourgeois idea that the two sexes that compose the people should be differentiated by their clothing has now been abandoned.

In the true spirit of dialectical materialism, all Grimsby workers are to wear identical jackets of drab green, and loose cotton trousers. There will be a choice of two sizes: too large, and too small. The Masses of Greater Grimsby will all be issued with caps and boots at no cost by the Worker-Student Voluntary Action Collective.

Henceforth the magazine Petticoat Discipline Monthly, a shameless and corrupt promotor of bourgeois imperialist values of the worst kind, will abandon its previous content.

From May Day 2002 it shall be called The Official Organ of the Wishes of the People and Workers of Grimsby, and their Friends in the World Movements for International Socialist Unity. Its content will change appropriately.

Grimsby - Viva the People!!!

Hectorina Gribble
April 1st 2002