Resonantly I was invited to have tea with an old and dear friend. We were joined by her daughter and twin teenaged grand daughters. It was one of the most unpleasant experiences in memory. The girls were dressed in tight, short, ragged, cut off, faded jeans and an equally short, ragged, cut off T-shirt. Either piece wouldn't have covered their bare midriff. They sprawled on the floor ensuring one couldn't miss how under-dressed they were. Not only were they rude, but they were vulgar. When their grandmother tried to correct them they told her 'get a life and join the****** 21st century'. It didn't get anymore civil for the rest of the afternoon. Her daughter half way tried to defend the twins. What a waste. Later my friend ask me where she went wrong, she raised her children with values similar to my own, even to the point of petticoating her son when necessary. Anyway, this is what started me thinking about
the subject of petticoating girls.

First we must ask ourselves, what do we expect of our daughter? If we set a high standard, then what can we do to ensure that they live up to it? When do we start, and how do we accomplish the desired results? Most importantly, do we have the fortitude to accomplish what we set out to do? Unless the answer to the last question is 'yes', forget the whole thing because you are doomed to fail. Talk to your partner, and agree on both the goals and the approach, because it will take both of you working together. Then explain to your daughter exactly what you expect and what you are going to do to accomplish it. Expect a tantrum and or tears, but hold firm.

It is best to start as early as possible, instiling an idea of how wonderful it is to be a girl. This is best done by dressing her like a girl, not a boy. Frilly underwear, pretty dresses, and girls socks and shoes. Tell her how pretty she is every chance you get. It helps to send her to a school that requires uniforms, that way you can ensure she is in skirts all the time. Discourage her from wearing pants for any reason, even when all her friends wear them. Tell her you don't want her to look like a yucky boy. Encourage her to play with dolls, learn to sew, and cook things you can do together.

If your daughter is already well on her way to being a tomboy or worse, then a much more forceful approach will need to be taken. Classical petticoating may be the only answer. Shocking her into wearing dresses instead of shorts can be quite easy. In England Directoire knickers (full bloomers) are still available in many stores, Whitford's and Sutton's for example. A few inches of pink knickers held in place by the elastic cuff showing below the bottom of her shorts will be quite effective, a little added lace would help. A pink nylon slip or chemise worn all the time discourages a bare midriff, and nylon hose with feminine shoes, not clodhoppers, will help.

A pink, lace-trimmed, long leg panty girdle can be substituted for knickers with the same effect. A pink bra must be worn all day. If she should still insist on wearing shorts make sure you take her out where all her friends can enjoy the sight. When she is properly dressed praise her and reward her, but not by letting backslide. Here again if she goes to a school requiring uniforms your job will be much simpler.

If all else fails a few weeks or months of full time diaper discipline will ensure even the most rebellious child will experience a marked change of attitude. Diapers don't show under full skirts but you can't hide them under pants. Good luck - the results should be worth the trouble they have worked for me with both sons and daughters.

Mary Beth

Thank you for your excellent advice Mary Beth, and I do know that you have achieved wonders with your own family by means of strict but loving petticoat discipline. Perhaps you can help me. I have received a letter from Victoria which possibly you can answer. I have never asked a reader to answer an 'Advice' request before, but I think that you are a real expert regarding petticoating of girls. Here is the letter:

Dear Nanny,

My name is Victoria Russell, currently I am taking care of my granddaughters while my daughter travels to the Americas for a year and a half.

I love those little girls dearly but have one concern, they are both very much tomboys.  Every attempt I have made to dress them like little girls should be is met with disobedience and scorn.  I have tried everything to mend this trend, including the traditonal spanking and bed without supper, which worked.  The next morning the girls tried again to subvert my authority and I spanked them again this time with an old wooden paddle which bought them to tears, but they did dress appropriately.

When I was a little girl I had to wear frilly dresses with short hems and matching pretty pants and a minimum of two petticoats.  My bother, sister and I dared not question what Mother chose for us or it was a visit to Father's study and a whipped bottom with his strap, after which you couldn't sit down for a week.

Please give me any advice you can as I don't want to be known as a Nana who spanks her grandchildren.
Regards,

Victoria Russell.

Well, over to you Mary Beth. Just as one final point, can any readers tell me the origin and meaning (if any) of this absurd modern expression, 'Get a life'? I have a life, thank you very much, and a much more productive and interesting one than the kind that the majority of teenagers seem to seek.
Susan