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Dear Helga, I apologize in advance for the length of this letter, but I wanted to share with you my own, by now rather extensive experiences with petticoating. I hope it is not too long for you to publish. While I had assumed that by now I knew practically everything there was to know on the topic, I am embarrassed to admit that I only recently became aware of your web site, having been told of it by a friend. You see I don't use the computer very much. However, I have now read much of it, and it's wonderful to know I am in such good company. It has also inspired me to write this letter. I had always felt more comfortable raising girls, and I was well content that my first two children were daughters, but when my third child, a boy (nee Alex Jr.), was born (some 16 years ago now), I admit I felt woefully ill-equipped to cope, a situation that was greatly exacerbated by my husband's authoritarian attitude toward child-rearing, which was that girls should be girly, and boys should be manly (read: "macho"), and never the twain shall meet. Thus, by the time Alex Jr. was twelve, his behavour had grown increasingly unmanageable, but my husband's response was always, "boys will be boys". Secretly, I'd always wanted to try petticoat discipline, which I'd known about for some time (I can't remember where I heard of it) and which I'd always found an intriguing idea, but to be honest, as long as my husband "ruled the roost" so to speak, I despaired of ever trying it. My husband was always a bit of a macho pig, frankly; he wouldn't even let Alex have a GI Joe, that being entirely too close to a "doll" for my husband to accept. All this changed some three and a half years ago, when I suddenly became aware of my husband's long string of dalliances with secretaries, bar-flies, and even female friends of mine, a situation which ultimately resulted in our separation, he to pursue still more amourous liaisons, me to raise my three children alone. And thus the possibility of petticoating Alex suddenly became a much more real possibility. By then, Alex was nearing his thirteenth birthday, and of course the sudden departure of his father did nothing to improve his disposition. He became still more sullen, obstinate and defiant, and I knew that if I didn't act soon he would likely be irretrievable. To prepare, I went through his oldest sister Heather's closet, looking for the some of the most frothily feminine garments I could find, with the intention of altering them to Alex's size. Because of my ex's insistence on his girls always looking like girls, there was no shortage of dresses to choose from. When Heather asked me what I was doing, I told her, and she (who had been victimized by Alex's errant behavior more than once) was delighted, and offered to help. She also offered to enlist the help of her younger sister, Jennifer. Well pleased to have some allies, I accepted the offer. Fortunately, an opportunity to begin was not long in coming. His school called to inform me that he had stolen a female classmate's diary from her knapsack, and had then proceeded to it aloud to his mates, before defiling it with several crude drawings. When he returned home, I let him know that the principal had called to fill me in on the details of his offense, and that he was in for the punishment of his life. I told him to take a shower and wash his hair (which he'd always kept rather long, that being the style among many boys at his school). In the interim, I selected a pale blue party dress with puff sleeves, a low-cut, gathered neckline, and modest crinolines, and laid it on his bed, along with a pair of Jennifer's white lace panties and one of her old training bras. I also selected some white ankle socks and a pair of mid-heeled blue pumps of mine, which I thought might fit him. Needless to say, his first response, upon realizing what his punishment would be, was shock and disgust, but I knew that this was a "make or break" situation. Either he accepted petticoating now, or he never would. In a loud, stern voice I told him that if he didn't comply I would be forced to spank him--something that I had never actually done myself, but his father had done regularly. Sobered by this threat (and no doubt remembering his father's firm hand), he donned the panties with trembling fingers, his lower lip quivering. I helped him into the bra, socks and the dress, zipping it up the back for him. (I remember thinking at the time that it fit rather well, given that I'd had to alter it without a fitting.) At my command, he donned the shoes, after which I brushed his hair into a modestly feminine style. Heather and Jen were thrilled, and excitedly offered to do his makeup and nails, but (for this first time at least) I demurred. I did allow them to put a pearl necklace, matching bracelet and barrettes on him, however. Sadly, neither I nor the girls had any un-pierced earrings, so that was something that would have to wait. The results were everything I could have hoped for. His demeanour calmed immediately, and while he tended to sulk from time to time during the rest of the evening, he was quite startlingly well-behaved and polite. The transformation was "night and day." Over the following months I exercised every opportunity I could to put him in dresses, and I expanded his wardrobe to include many more dresses and skirts, lacy, satiny underwear, shoes, makeup, and so forth. With his sisters' enthusiastic participation, his dress became more complete. Makeup and nail polish became regular parts of his attire, as did high heels and a wide variety of sumptuous jewellery, and accessories. It's three years later, and he now routinely spends perhaps 70-80 percent of his time at home in dresses. While I would not go so far as to say that he actually likes his feminine attire, he now changes into it without a murmur of complaint, and has many times appeared in public, for shopping trips, visits to the beauty salon, and the occasional meal out or movie. While he was terrified at first of being seen and recognized, he has now accepted the fact that as long as we do not frequent the local malls, he is almost always accepted by others as a young lady. This past summer we got his ears pierced, and he now routinely wears earrings along with his feminine attire. His legs are always shaved, and he has now also graduated to wearing adult bras. Under his sisters' instruction, he has learned to do his own hair, makeup and nails, all of which he does quite well. His sisters are generally in charge of purchasing his makeup, and typically select prettily feminine shades of polish and lipstick: frosted pinks, mauves and corals, and some rich, sophisticated reds, along with eye shadow, mascara, blush, etc. Recently, Heather even taught him how to apply false eyelashes (something he has yet to attempt himself, but we'll see.) The girls and I still tend to choose his outfits for him as, if left to his own devices, he often tends to select something rather simple, with few accessories. Of course, our choices are always sumptuously feminine, and always incorporate some pretty earrings, bracelets, rings, and a necklace, and usually include some fairly dramatic heels (which he now walks in rather well!) We have also started to call him/her "Alice" when dressed. I am now contemplating next steps. Over this summer I would like see him in something semi-permanent, perhaps some long acrylic nails, which he would of course have to keep polished. I have also pondered getting him (as is very much the style for teenage girls in our area) a tiny nostril stud, but I have yet to decide on that. His hair has grown long enough now to be set in a variety of feminine styles, either an updo, or worn long, something his sisters delight in doing, and interestingly, he doesn't seem to mind. I am also contemplating buying him a wardrobe of more age-appropriate clothes, rather than the frothily feminine outfits he has typically worn up to now. It has occurred to me that after all this time in frills and lace, being allowed to wear, say, a casual denim miniskirt and top, or perhaps a light sundress and heels, along with some fashionable teenage jewellery, makeup and nails, might actually seem a reward, by comparison. This would be especially true when we are in public, since he would blend in more fully than he does now. I believe this might be used quite effectively as a reward for good behaviour. And speaking of behaviour, his (or perhaps I should now say, "her") demeanour is now a complete reversal of his previous incorrigibility. He is polite, diffident, and, at times, even somewhat feminine. It is a good thing he is coming to accept his frequent sojourns into femininity without protest, as it is becoming difficult to find times when he actually needs punishment! Thank you, Helga, for letting me share this with your readers. Christine Thank you for your sharing your experience with us Christine. I'm sure many readers can relate to the positive effect that petticoating had on your son and for those mothers contemplating using this technique, I hope this will serve as a splendid example. Helga |